Yellow balloons marked the way to the Warren High School gym, where the first Father-Con in Downey was being held last week. Father-Con’s target audience is “fathers, future fathers, father figures,” and the goal is to build strong family relationships, father-son and father-daughter.

Inside, a stage had been erected about mid-court and 30 white tables with black and gold balloons donated by Patty's Balloons N Flowers and dressed with black tablecloths offered comfortable and informal seating. The walls were lined with another 30 tables from different agencies telling how help and resources could be gotten.

By noontime, the crowd of a hundred of more was mostly young, mostly male. More attendees constantly drifted in.

Homes without a father have been linked to many social problems, and this conference was composed of local groups attempting to introduce the audience to these new contemporary challenges, such as sex trafficking and pornography, as well as gangs and juvenile delinquency. A tall order, but as Anne Frank was quoted as saying, “Isn’t it wonderful that none of us need wait a moment before starting to change the world.”

Cecelia Goñez, the Soroptimist and community activist on behalf of stopping sex trafficking, came over to welcome me and offer a bottle of water. “Through Father-Con,” said Cecelia, “I believe we can and will make an impact in this war against human trafficking. We are combating the issue at its source and focusing on prevention. ‘Con’ can stand for conversation too.”

Looking around the gym walls I saw league champion banners, both for Warren boys and girls. Of all their trophies the boys need not one but two banners to list all the years they have won the league in Wrestling, and the Lady Bears excel in cross country. Title IX has opened enormous opportunities and raised self-esteem for girls and women through sports.

The speaker when I came in was telling about youthful delinquency that results in death. “We need to break a way out,” said Armand King of Paving Great Foundations. He deals with his experiences in the streets and his goal is to rehabilitate the marginalized and at-risk communities in San Diego. As a reformed former pimp whose closest friend was killed, he now speaks about his experiences in sex trafficking all over the country.

Another speaker asked “Are you loving your daughter?” Girls without a father figure are susceptible to the kind of lies from strangers that can lead them to leave home and into sex trafficking. “What she sees in you is what she’s going to look for in other men.”

“A man’s role is to be Top Gun in the family,” the speaker said in forceful terms guys would understand. “Here’s what I did and what you can do: love your wife; model your faith; and take your daughter on trips.”

We saw pictures of Disneyland and a marine tide-pool outing. “Move heaven and earth to fulfill your daughter’s dreams,” he said.

Later, I talked with Ronnie Fernandez at his display table. Ronnie has started a counseling service: Therapy… but for Guys.

**Ronnie Fernandez. Photo by Lorine Parks**

“Men won’t talk about their feelings,” Ronnie said. “And they have to be challenged strongly to do something. Or else they won’t do it.”

“Twenty-five years ago,” said Ronnie, “there was the movement, ‘You don’t have to have a man in the house.’ That was to empower the single women who had to brings up their children without a father figure. But the pendulum has swung and now we are seeing that males whose self-esteem is already frayed could be discouraged, hearing that, from playing their part.”

The Father-Con Conference was sponsored in part by the YWCA – the W stands for Women – of San Pedro and the South Bay Area. In April of 2020 the YWCA is holding a Film and Arts Festival, a prevention and awareness event. Their slogan is, “To end it we must first see it.”

Shari Farmer is the field deputy for the Bureau of Victim Services, part of the office of Jackie Lacey, District Attorney for Los Angeles County that has sponsored a symposium on child exploitation.

“This outreach got started 42 years ago,” said Shari, “to protect victims who testified against possible retribution.” Now every county in the state has a witness protection unit providing an array of services to help victims become survivors. Program services are provided free of charge.

“Your state and county tax dollars at work,” I suggested, but “No,” said Sheri.

“This money comes from the fines the guilty defendants pay. We like to think of it as the bad guys paying for their crimes. At the end of every year we have a holiday party and take about 200 needy witnesses and their families out for dinner.”

Other organizations invited to display their contributions included the Crittendon Services for Children and Families, a nationwide social services

group with a local branch in Fullerton partnering against sex trafficking.

The Southeast Academy had a table right by the entrance. It is a tuition-free public high school that prepares students for a future career in law enforcement, military and fire services, with a small campus, fully accredited curriculum, and 100% graduation rate.

Cecilia introduced me to Patrick Erlandson, of Men Standing Against Trafficking. Trafficking is not only for sex purposes: there is labor trafficking too. Patrick founded this event, and his watchword is, “If you see something, say something.”

“Cyber experience of children,” said Patrick. “That’s something new to be aware of. Up to nearly a million predators are online at any one time, hunting for children who will talk to them. Being a father in the 21st century is a whole new ball game.”

“Pornography actually changes the brain,” Patrick said. “We call to men to take a stand against what is a male demand driven industry of exploitation. It impacts up to 500,000 divorces a year.”

**Chris Garrido. Photo by Lorine Parks**

Also seen: Martha Medford Sodetani, talking with several men from Courage Forward, a Downey-based group helping vets recover from stress. They partner with youth at risk, to create a new community feeling. Martha helps with grief counseling, so the stages can be identified as the vets go through post traumatic stress.

“I like working in Downey,” said Chris Garrido, president of the group. “It’s like my second home. There is such a feeling of solidarity in the community.” Frank Dean, one of the organizers of Courage Forward, agreed.

Spotted across the room: Downey Mayor Rick Rodriguez, cheerful as always but looking a little leaner after his recent hospital stay. The last time we talked was in August at an open air screening of “Star Wars,” his Movies with the Mayor Night at the Columbia Space Center, when he was dressed as Obi-Wan Kenobe, a father figure to Luke Sky Walker.

By now it was 2 o’clock, and Mayor Rick addressed the group. “I want to say thank you to my father,” he began by saying. He then awarded proclamations from the City of Downey to 15 or so of those present, “in recognition by this city” for their help. Then Mayor Rick himself was given a Heart of the Family award.

Father-Con stresses the importance of being a dad