Mary Van Straten Graef
December 14, 1924 - February 27, 2023
Mary Van Straten Graef, a Downey resident of 70 years, peacefully passed away on February 27, 2023, at her home with her children at her bedside.
Mary was born December 14, 1924, on her family farm in Baraga, Michigan. Her parents were George and Gertrude Van Straten. She was raised by her mother and aunt Ann and worked the farm with her 2 sisters Gertrude and Martha, brother Peter and foster brothers Carl and Fritz.
Mary graduated high school and happily left the farm when she was 17. She joined the war effort and was proud to be trained as a welder. She worked at the Willow Run complex, welding parts for the B24 bomber.
Mary made quite an impression on Charles Graef, a USN sailor. Charles saw Mary at a dance, promptly drove his date home, and came back to dance with Mary. They continued to dance in each other’s arms for 52 years.
Mary and Charles married in 1945, packed their few belongings and traveled across country from Ann Arbor, Michigan to Inglewood, California.
Charles worked as an aircraft engineer and Mary worked at Douglas Aircraft plant delivering parts on roller skates with her lifelong friend, Weezie Hartzell.
Mary and Charles started their family in Westchester, California and in 1953, moved to Downey with 4 of their 6 children.
Mary enjoyed caring for her children and husband. Always cooking, cleaning, washing, and driving, and always looking her fashionable best, along with her children.
She was a self-taught seamstress making many of her own clothes, and her children’s clothes including pajamas, prom dresses, holiday outfits, communion dresses, bridesmaid dresses and even Pendleton shirts for the boys.
Vacations were spent camping at Doheny State Beach so everyone could surf and swim.
In 1961, Mary was named Stonewood’s Mother of the Year. Her daughter, Patricia, entered her in the contest.
She had a wonderful time basking in the title and using the gift certificates from the burgeoning mall.
Mary was a team mother with North Downey Little League and Girls Softball. She was on the board of North Downey Little League and responsible for purchasing candy for the “Snack Shacks”. She was involved with Junior Catholic Daughters of America, a member of Our Lady of Perpetual Help-Downey parish and Women’s Guild. She was also a mentor for Big Sisters of America.
As her children grew older, she worked at a Miller’s store for men and Gemco department store. She was an avid bridge player, achieving the rank of Life Master playing consistently with her partner, Bess Kennedy, at Downey Bridge Club.
In 1982, Charles took a position in Melbourne, Australia. They packed their bags and started an exciting adventure for 3 years. They lived the Australian life, made new friends, and traveled the other side of the world.
They returned to the states, enjoyed traveling to Puerto Vallarta, bowling at Del Rio Lanes, and spending time with their grandchildren.
Charles passed away at the young age of 75. It was the end of a beautiful love affair. Mary kept busy playing bridge, volunteering with Kaiser Hospice, and visiting her grandchildren.
Jim Canning, a friend of the family, became a joyful companion to Mary. They enjoyed art, film, traveling and hanging out at local pubs. They were the best of friends from 1999 until Jim’s death in 2012.
Mary survived and thrived after colon and breast cancer. Mary was inflicted with the West Nile Virus in 2016. Doctors said she would never get out of bed. True to form, Mary’s zest for life and determination surprised her doctors, she went home to complete her recovery and continued to celebrate many family milestones.
Growing up during The Depression, Mary developed a strong work ethic. She took pride in her appearance and her home. She strived to be a good wife and a loving mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. She was most proud of bringing 6 beautiful people into the world and witnessing their many accomplishments and hard work. In turn, it brought her joy to see her children raise their own children and to be a part of her grandchildren’s and great-grandchildren’s lives.
Mary is greeted by many family members in eternal life.
Her mother and father, aunt Ann, her older sisters Gertrude Lafond and Martha Bruckbauer, little brother Peter Van Straten, her beloved husband, Charles, Jim Canning, her companion of 12 years and granddaughter, Sarah. She leaves her children: Patricia, Michael, Peter (Polly), Chris (Rhonda), Joanne (Jose) and Lizbeth (Doug), Grandchildren: Rose (John) Matthew (Sara), Hannah, Samuel, Maddie, Milly, Willem, Gus and Owen, and Great-Grandchildren: Noah, Fern, Georgia and Milo
The Graef family is most grateful to the compassionate caregivers, and loving family that cared for “Miss Mary” during her last years. They were kind, generous, and loving companions.
A rosary will be prayed on Monday, April 17 at 6:00PM at Miller Mies Downey Mortuary. A Catholic Mass will be held on Tuesday, April 18 at 11AM at OLPH. If desired, donations can be made to Alzheimer Research or Smile Train.